Lies

A lie (also called prevarication, falsehood) is a type of deception in the form of an untruthful statement, especially with the intention to deceive others.

Yep, we have all been there. We have either told one or we have been told one. Probably both. But do we ever sit back and think about the consequenses? What impact they really have?
Yes when someone told one to yourself.
There is nothing worse then seeing something slip away. A person being a friend, a partner, family member or whatever it is. A lie can destroy it all in seconds.
But whats worse? Hiding something in belive your protecting the other person from pain? Or telling the truth? I guess i depends on what the lie is about.
However I have noticed the latter seem to be the best. Whatever it is, it cant be worse then being led behind the light.
It casues so much pain, thinking about it, wonder, have your whole body shake with anger. Anger of not knowing.
It has happend before, and I have done my best to not put anyone else through that.
But what do we do when we are the one being led behind the light? How do we move on from it, how can we let it go? Will the anger and the hurt of losing a loved one ever go away?
It will slowly go away with time, but maybe not completly. We will miss that person, those times. And when it comes down to it, we will remember it all as a lie.
Its funny that the people that talks most about honesty, the ones who seem to cherish it highly, are the ones that ends up lying. For whatever reason they do it. The person on the other side will sit there, wonder. Was anything true? Was it all a lie? Was it all for nothing?
What is the lesson of all this? To learn self-controll, to learn how to be a better person? What is it?
I guess you wont find out, maybe not until years later. I guess you just have to suck it up, grief and move on. At the end of the day thats all we can do, move on.
Every time you put your trust in someone you risk being hurt. And when someone puts their trust on you, they risk being hurt. We can only do what we can do. But we can learn from our mistakes, we can be better people, we can make sure that we will never put anyone in that situation.
It hurts being there, not knowing, being betrayed.
I feel bad for what I have put some people through, I feel bad every time I cant controll my anger and I end up saying hurtful things. I cant take them back. I can only look for understanding and forgiveness.
I understand now, I have been there now. I have learnt from it. All that is left now is let time heal what is broken. Move on and be a better person from it.

There are so many things to be happy for, good friends, great family, good music and the smell of fresh air. There is no reason letting a lie come between that. Filling your time with things you enjoy and people you love will be the way to go. Every day is a day closer to closure.

The semester is coming to an end, only exams left now. Then it is time to relax for a while before it starts again. Melb winter has arrived and as much as I complained last year, its nice to get a break from the heat.
To my family back home, I miss you lots and will hopefully see you all soon! xx

winter has arrived

The winter has arrived. Its getting chilly and darker. Reminds me about the end of summer back home, reminds me of family and friends I miss. You always miss a best friend hey, as hard as it is life has to move on. It hurts sometimes to know your not involved in peoples life as much as you should. I know you cannot blame time, but life gets busy sometimes and you "forget", you leave it to later and you think one day it will all be fine. Maybe it wont, maybe its a new life on the horizon, at least I have the memories. They will always stay.
I went for a walk tonight, it was nice and chilly, dark and I had my ipod. I started thinking about expectations. Maybe we set them to high, not only on our self but on others as well. People are who they are, if you know a person you know how they are like, their good sides and their bad. So why is it that we expect things from them that we know will not come throu? we are really setting our self up for disappointment and the other person to feel like a failure. Im not saying we should not have any expectations on people, but maybe we should give our selfs and others a break sometimes.
We are only human and humans come with faults.
Life is a journey even though u feel like your not going anywhere, once you reach your goals you realise you where on your way all along. It was just to early to see.